A Hearty Nomad

Killer on Ice Cream Break

Killer on Ice Cream Break in New Zealand

 What is the best way to really get to know the locals while travelling?
For me the answer is: hitch-hiking and couchsurfing!
I’ve done it all my life, but standing on the road and hoping for someone interesting to stop and give you a ride is a thrill.

Many moons ago I hitch-hiked around New Zealand for 66 days. Trying to move around both islands during winter isn’t easy, sometimes the ride is just a mile along, but a mile is better than none. Sometimes took me 1 ride but other 8 to reach my destination.

Hitch-hiking is always an adventure, and here I’m gonna tell you 3 of them, they happened one after the other:

THE HOUSE IN THE WOODS

This woman picked me up and seconds into the ride she says “Would you like to have some freshly baked cookies?” and then added “I live around here, you are welcome to stay if you want”.
I did what any other sane person would do. I accepted her offer of course, FRESHLY
BAKED COOKIES!!!

IS THAT A GUN OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME?

The next day with my belly full of cookies it was time to hit the road again.
A minivan stopped, it took me milliseconds to jump in.
The driver was not alone, there was another hitchhiker in, I sat on the back and locked the door.
And bang!
There she was; the biggest gun I have ever seen in my life so close.
.

I had to breathe as this was new to me.
“What you need this gun for?”  I asked, I was curious.
“I kill” He said.
My heart dropped, and a bit after I asked “Kill what?”
“Deer, I’m a hunter” he said
I started to breath again.

Riddle time:
A guy rides in on a friday, stays for 3 days and leaves on friday again. How is this posible?
Your guess in the comment section please. 


Back to subject, the previous ride was just a warmup for what it was in store for me.

MURDER ON A BREAK 

The hunter dropped me off, 2 hours later I was still waiting for my next ride. I was freezing my ass off, 4 cars passed and none even slowed down.
I was getting restless, but then and old black car slowed down and stopped.
Windows rolled down and he was eating ice cream, mind you it was winter!
And to top it all he looked extremely unhappy.
Red flags all over, I had a bad feeling but I needed to move on.
I had to go against my gut feeling and think positive, so I jumped in, hoping I’d get out of the car alive.

I sat down and thanked him.
He didn’t even look at me, not even a nod, just drove slowly eating his ice cream.
We’ve been driving for 20 minutes and at that speed it would take me at least an hour to reach my destination.

Then he finally said something, something I hadn’t heard.
Driver: You know there is a murderer out there who kills hitch-hikers?
Me: No way!
Driver: Yeah, (in a strong southern kiwi accent, very nasal) he’s been at large for many years.
Me: Oh! Well I am a lucky dude.

Driver: You no dude you gay! (I was in urgent need of a diaper change). It is a pity many people disappear.

In that moment he locked the door….. (No fucking way, is he kidding, fuck me…. no, no, not today…)


Me: utter a nervous “hmm”
I was breathing heavily but the engine was louder so he couldn’t hear I guess.
He went silent again.
I had accepted my faith.
What kind of secret message could I leave so they could find him after he killed me? I thought to myself.
I couldn’t signal people, there were only sheep along the road.
15 minutes later he spoke again.
Driver: I won´t kill!
Me: Thank you. I am relieved. I think I need to change my underwear.

He looked at me for the first time, it looked like he was considering killing me.
The longest 80 minutes of my life, felt like years.
I thought I was gonna get killed by a grumpy looking man.
I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me alive was the ice cream he was eating. The scariest ride and the longest ever. Someone eating ice cream never been that scary before or since.
Once we arrived he told me to be more careful and not to trust everyone.
I’m sure he was the killer but it was his day off.
My lucky day!

Have you ever hitch hiked?
How far would you go for freshly baked cookies?
Have you ever met a potential serial killer?
Ever needed a change of diapers after meeting someone?

 

This Post Has 15 Comments

  1. Leo you were lucky with that last ice-cream eating murderer – I think you may be right about him – you caught him on a day off! I never hitch-hiked……was told enough horror stories about what could happen that it truly put the fear in me – I’m sure I missed out on some interesting adventures OR like you, the thrill of knowing I was with a potential axe murderer but managing to catch him on a day off!

    Hugs, Pam

    1. Pam,
      This didn’t happen to Leo lol
      Leo is not the hitch hiking type, he’s more of a taxi/ubber kinda guy, probable because he grew up in the US and he heard plenty of those stories too.
      He tells me often he doesn’t wanna meet a Jeffrey Dahmer, I didn’t know who Jeffrey was till he told me.
      I’d be scared too.

      1. WHOOPS – it sure sounded like the typical Leo-adventure but it’s nice to know he’s not the only person who goes ALL OUT when it comes to seeing the world! Sorry about that! If I could edit the comment I would!!

        1. Ohh don’t worry!
          It’s fine, no big deal, he’s a really crazy character but he tends to think more I guess lol

  2. Gosh, that sounded really scary (and thrilling!) You are one brave soul!

    1. Yeah it was damn scary but hey I survived and after that I got invited to eat a 6 month old stew.

  3. Hey, your post brought back sooo many warm memories of NZ South Island… thank you!
    I haven’t met anyone like your murderer buddy, but you know what, I reckon I needed a change of diaper just reading it! It reminded of the film No Country for Old Men; murder in all its rugged beauty…

    1. New Zealand is so laidback it’s wonderful. Still did not watch the movie. Do you recommend it ? Happy weekend!

      1. Yep, the guy in that film is a real creep. That’s the first thing that came to mind when you mentioned your story…?

  4. omg… I did this only one time in my life (during a holiday in turkey with my mother LOL) …and I think I do it never again…

    1. Damn, how brave! With your mom? You remember how long the ride was?
      I love hitch hiking and did it the other day again. Sat in a BMW next to a four month old blue Chow Chow puppy. My cutest 5 hour ride ever. Happy weekend buddy!

  5. My goodness, be careful out there!!

    1. I am always careful but sometimes the Hamster takes the wheel ?

  6. Jeez…crazy ride! At least you got fresh baked cookies out of first ride.

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